I’m known for capturing those didn’t-know-you-were-there shots and busting a move on the dance floor just to get those perfect candids. I also work with you to ensure we incorporate your style and story into your engagement and wedding photos!
I’m sure you all have heard things like ‘you can do whatever you want on your wedding day’ or ‘add some character to your wedding decor and style’. Things like that? If you haven’t well, you absolutely can do whatever you want on your wedding day, however very few actually do. Why? I think a big part of doing the whole traditional wedding staying the same, and well, traditional, is because of the wedding industry vendors, parents, boomers, and really the industry as a whole. Most people are used to doing/ planning weddings a certain way and since most of us have not actually planned a wedding in our lifetimes, we rely on the experts and don’t say anything about it.
Sure couples might not have a cake to cut, but instead have doughnuts or pie, or something cute, but did you know you can change more? You can change way more things about your wedding. Crazy- I know!!
The Wedding Script, is what I like to call the traditional wedding schedule of events. You know, the traditional things like having a first dance, cake cutting, father daughter dance, bouquet and garter toss, etc. But I’m here today to share with you all how to break away from this ‘wedding script’ and make your own memories- not what the industry has told you to do.
First, let’s talk about traditions that are already on their way out:
While these all seem like fun and touching moments you might want on your wedding day, most people are doing away with them. Studies have found that couples don’t like tossing the bouquet or garter toss because they don’t want competition among the single men and women at their wedding. They don’t think a father should give away his daughter like she’s a prized horse, things like that. When I heard this, I was like WOW!!
But it’s honestly true! In my opinion, these are some really old traditions that should change!
And I’m not saying vendors are innocent in all this.
For decades, photographers have taken photos of the SAME things on every wedding day… because the industry has taught us this. When we get there, take photos of the wedding dress hanging up. Check. Take photos of the rings on the invitations. Check. It’s all the same! But what if we broke out of that ‘wedding script’ and did things our way to tell more of your story, more of setting the scene of you getting ready, more of those traditional moments of your guests coming into the reception, or getting excited before your ceremony, wouldn’t that be more… emotional and real?
Recently, I’ve been made aware of this ‘wedding script’ (as I like to call it) and I’m 100% determined to break away from it all. I want to take more photos that have emotion, context, depth, sound, etc. Everything more than what most people expect. You feel me?
Don’t shy away from doing what you want the most. Please empty your mind of all the traditions you’ve seen at weddings, know about weddings, and what people have told you to have at your wedding. If you don’t want a first dance, then don’t have one. If you don’t want to have toasts/ speeches from your wedding party, then don’t. Maybe instead of a roast! haha Or just eat, share that desert is available, champagne, etc, and just have a party. Make more time to see people, walk around the reception hall, enjoy your guests’ company.
2. Tell your wedding vendors all your non-traditional events you want to do at your wedding so they are prepared.
Make sure they know of the changes so they too, can break away from the ‘wedding script’. Most vendors who have been in this game a while don’t know beyond what is normally traditional, so having a warning is super helpful. Knowing what you have planned is SUPER HELPFUL because then we are prepared, we can get the necessary equipment we need, and get in the correct position so we don’t miss anything.
Once I was told the day of that the wedding party was doing a flash mob after the couple’s first dance, so thankfully, this was during the wedding party photos, so I asked for all the details, and was in the position to be prepared in. BUT I recommend telling people, at least your videographer and photographer about your plans beforehand.
3. Look for vendors who don’t do the normal photos, look at their photos and video with depth, look for context, look for emotion. Look for the personality of the couple and the vibe of the day. This can be tricky if you don’t have mush knowledge about photography or what to look for. I want you to get the photos and video you want, so just look at the work your vendors are providing and see if you can see yourself in your images. 🙂
So hopefully this was helpful with breaking away from all the traditional stuff that weddings normally have. Again, sounding like a broken record, you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. And when you do what you actually want to do, tell your vendors.
It doesn’t matter if others think it’s weird, doesn’t matter what your parents think, just do you and you’ll be way happier in the end. After all, you’re paying a ton of money to have your wedding happen at all, so why not do what makes your heart happy? 🙂 Just throwing that out there!
If you have any questions, feel free to reach out to me at any time! I love thinking of fun new things to come up with at weddings, or alternatives to make you guys more comfortable and happy 🙂
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